Losing something you love is far from an easy pill to swallow.
Being fired from a job you really enjoyed, for example—even if your career with the company ended amicably—can take a toll on your mental health and overall well-being.
In fact, studies show thatgetting fired can feel worse than grieving a spouse, undergoing a divorce, or enduring a breakup for some people.
It may induce some semblance of an identity crisis for those who took great pride in their work, and it can be psychologically damaging for those who were particularly passionate about their work.
Never mind that getting fired can fuel a financial fiasco, which doesn’t do well for the psyche either.
But rest assured that getting fired doesn’t have to be the end of the world, even if it may feel like it at first. But don’t just take our word for it. Look at the data.
Nearly all executives who’ve been fired beforecontinue to climb in their careers, according to HRB research.
More specifically, 68 percent of executives who’ve been let go have landed a new job within just six months, and 24 percent have snagged a new role within the year. Of them, 91 percent took jobs of similar or even higher levels of seniority. Seventy-eight percent actually see their way to CEO.
Nevertheless, it can be tough to remain optimistic when you’re let go of a job you love. So we caught up with executives who’ve been in your shoes to learn their coping mechanisms for surviving the slump.
Here’s what they had to say.
1. Seek professional help if necessary.
“I was fired from a job I loved,” says Robin Young, the founder and CEO ofFitness SavvyandGarden Furniture Sales. “I had worked my way up from an accounts assistant through to CFO in just four years and was on great money, and enjoyed the company of most people I worked with. But, because of my autism spectrum disorder (ASD), I clashed with two of the company directors.”
Young’s mother was in the final stages of lung cancer, and she had an eight-month-old baby of her own when she was fired. She’d also just bought a house based on the salary she was earning. To emotionally cope with the loss of the job she loved—coupled with the struggles in her personal life—she first paid a visit to her doctor to procure medication to treat her ASD. From there, she used her time tofight her dismissaland, ultimately, landed a settlement. Then, she started her own business, Fitness Savvy, with her payout.
“Fitness and starting a business were huge aspects that helped me deal with the huge blow I received, but it was important to seek help from my doctor to help with the anxiety and depression of losing the job,” she says.
2. Look inward for fresh perspectives and future desires.
Alex Smith, the CEO, and recruiting manager ofLuckybobbleheads, an e-commerce company, was fired from a job as an IT professional in 2008 due to apersonality clash with his superior. However, he says being fired ended up being thebest thing to happen to him, especially since his former company was “fair” and provided him with a reference.
“It gave me time to find alternative employment,” he explains. “I had four job offers after this firing, so I was in the best position possible. I made the right decision, and my salary increased significantly.”
His advice to others?
“Keep in mind that your fresh perspectives will aid your progress,” he says. “Employers seek candidates with high levels of emotional intelligence (i.e., self-awareness). You may hone that muscle by being fired from a job, especially if it’s one you loved.”
He also adds to use this time to reflect on the aspects of your former job that you disliked. Then make it a point to look for the kind of workplace you do want in your next job.
“I considered what kind of employment I would prefer and made a list of everything I needed and wanted from my new position,” he says. “I desired a relaxed work environment and a more casual dress code. I also require things like flexible work schedules, comprehensive health insurance, and a retirement savings strategy.”
3. Give yourself time to grieve your loss.
“Being fired from a job that I loved was probably the hardest time of my life,” says Jeremy James, the founder, and CEO ofBlue Water Climate Control. “I enjoyed waking up to the thought of going back to the place and giving it my best. It was not entirely my fault that I was fired, and it wasn’t me alone who was sent away. Our team made a mistake, and we all suffered greatly because of it. To this day, I think about that job and often regret making that small mistake—but then I am also somehow grateful because, if not for the incident, I would not have had the motivation to do something of my own with the little that I had.”
James says that he was in “a dark place” after being fired. But eventually, he pulled himself together and gathered a team to make something out of his passion for nature and climate.
“Some might need more time to get over it, and some could reel back immediately and do good for themselves,” he says of the speed at which people heal from being fired. “Overall, it is about you and how long you think you should take.”
Other CEOs agree.
“I was recently fired from a job I loved, and it was a tough experience to go through, but I found some ways to cope with the emotional fallout,” says Vince Tint, CEO of12sm Agency. “First, I gave myself time to grieve. I allowed myself to be sad and angry for a while before trying to move on. I also talked to my friends and family members about what happened. They were supportive and helped me to see the situation in a different light.”
After he took space for himself to heal, he started looking for new opportunities. He adds that he didn’t let the experience of being fired stop him from pursuing his dream career.
4. Feel whatever it is that you’re feeling.
Brian Case, the director of e-commerce and retail atSelkirk, also acknowledges that you need to feel your emotions.
“If your first instinct is to feel offended, angry, or sad, that’s perfectly fine,” he says. “Make sure you allow yourself to express your feelings in a safe manner.”
Just don’t go on a rant on social media, he warns. That could (and is likely to) have a negative impact on your prospects of getting a job in the future.
“It’s better to get together with some of your closest friends and let it all out,” he advises. “Alternatively, enroll in a yoga or meditation class, or engage in some sort of physical activity to stimulate your heart rate. It’s okay if you want to cry in your pajamas at home in a fetal position if that’s what you need. It’s important to choose a solution that’s right for you.”
5. Don’t fall off focus—keep networking.
“Late last year, I was fired from a job I loved, and it ended up being the best possible thing that could happen to me,” says Dennis Shirshikov, a strategist atAwning.com, a real estate company for investors. “At this job, I was running a big team, and I was responsible for multiple projects, but I didn’t ask for a raise because I loved the job and didn’t want to risk it.”
The next job he got offered him 40 percent more money for very similar work, he says. He was also afforded more interesting responsibilities. Keeping up withnetworkingand staying in the game was how he eventually landed that new job.
“When I got fired, I exchanged information with some of my coworkers, and, personally, I devoted all my time to applying for new jobs to avoid losing focus,” he explains. “I’d get on calls with old coworkers to keep up with routine and to continue to socialize with people. I even reached out to people that I worked with at previous jobs, and one of them ended up giving me the lead for the new position.”
If you need help keeping motivated, Ivy Exec is in your corner. We have plenty of resources onwhat to do if you get firedtowhat to say if it happens.